Monday, v.2

I’m going to answer the questions in this post again. Here’s why:

• Because someone just commented on it, so I read it and got all nostalgic.
• Because it’s been almost three years.
• Because my body/mind/sternum area is freaking out and I need to typetypetype.
• Because everyone’s probably sick of me filling up their twitter feed tonight.

8 Things I Am Passionate About

1. Grady. (Shocker!)
2. Knitting, and by “knitting” I mean “everything that involves strings.” Someone recently got all in my face on youtube because I said “knitting” about a crochet project and I was like, “Eff you man.” DRAMA.
3. Journalism, kind of. I’m pretty good at phoning in passion about journalism at this point, which is part of why I recently quit working at two newspapers. (oh yeah. I was going to blog about that. maybe later.)
4. My stupid life. I tend to think my stupid life is really critically important.
5. Feminism and junk.
6. Appearances, as loathe as I am to admit it.
7. Honesty! Here’s the thing: radical honesty is hard. And so socially awkward. And also so rewarding.
8. Learning. Though it’s well established that I’m an awful student, I do really enjoy learning.

8 Things I Want to Do Before I Die

1. Have actual conversations in English with Grady. Really excited for this.
2. Fall in love with someone who loves me back.
3. See my beautiful sister Kim get married (this summer!)
4. Expand the family business. Even just a little would be great.
5. Take Grady to see all different sorts of cultures and people and places while she is young and impressionable.
6. Be genuinely happy with my body.
7. I don’t know. I’m trying to think of something career-related, but I so love my current “stick with one job for six months or so before completely changing your day-to-day” situation. I do kind of want to open my own yarn/vintage/coffee place, but that’s a pipe dream.
8. Find a body-hair-management system that works. I should do a blog post about how my body is modern cosmetics’ greatest enemy.

8 Things I Say Often

1. “No-no, Gradybelle.”
2. “Can mama change your diaper please?”
3. Swear words. All of them, often in inappropriate public places.
4. Sorry.
5. “Oooooh, Winner-binner-booga-boo-snuggle-wumps-winny-lufagus.” (Or something similar. When Winston is cuddly it melts me into a pool of tender love. A tender-love-pool.)
6. “Can mama have kisses?” (No. Mama can never have kisses.)
7. “I am the queen.” (I have no idea. This is the mantra that calms me down. It is most often said in long repetition while I bury my face in a pillow, or while I am driving.)
8. I don’t know. You tell me.

See #5 above.

8 Books I Have Read Lately/Am Reading Now

1. Just started Faultline by Sylvia Ortiz Taylor.
2. Gave up halfway through John Henry Days by Colson Whitehead.
3. The Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
4. The Actor and the Target by Declan Donnelan
5. Some boring-as-hell media textbook
6. Utopia by Thomas Moore
7. Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
8. Opting In by Amy Richards

8 Songs I Could Listen to Over and Over (chosen from my favorite recent downloads – so this doesn’t include my all-time favorites)

1. I’ll be Here in the Morning by Townes van Zant
2. Shout Bama Lama by The Detroit Cobras (hell, that whole album is magnificent. It may be the first non-Bowie album I’ve ever downloaded where every song gets five stars.)
3. Solitude is Bliss by Tame Impala (Grady adores this song. She always dances to it, which may be why I love it so much.)
4. Thirteen by Big Star (another magnificent album. But this song just kills me.)
5. Fly by Night by Rush (I know there are a lot of Rush-haters out there, which I just completely don’t understand.)
6. Musician Please Take Heed by God Help the Girl (iTunes says I downloaded this song about a month and a half ago, and listened to it 42 times since then. And that’s only the on-the-computer stats.)
7. Hark I Hear by the Deseret Chamber Singers. (I should hate this, but holy moly it is amazing. I have it because I wrote an article about the singers, and am so glad I did. I usually don’t love music this religious, but man. Also, I’m coming to terms with my love for a cappella/choral music. Deal with it, nerds.)
8. The Box by Johnny Flynn (Best song about homelessness ever.)

8 Things That Attract Me to My Best Friends

1. Intelligence – particularly an ability to read and write. And spell. And comprehend. And have an impressive vocabulary. I’m admittedly prejudiced against people that destroy grammar.
2. A challenge – I like my friends to be smarter than me; this is not a quality that I’ve always had, though. Especially when I was a kid, I was really intimidated by people who were smarter than me or who saw through the facade; I generally treated these people horribly. Luckily, now that’s exactly what I crave.
3. My very best friend remains my friend because we know each other so well and have excellent repartee. And, like, care about each other, I suppose.
4. Online presence. I know, it sounds lame, but I love the idea of facebook/twitter/blogs/whatever being a genuine extension of self. Especially now that I don’t get out much (Grady puts such a crimp in my social life), I depend on the internet to keep in touch with people.
5. Open-mindedness. (Ug. I hate typing/thinking “minded.”) Especially since I’m so perpendicular to the predominant culture around here.
6. Honesty! This should be the first item.
7. Common interests – babies, similar philosophy, journalism, knitting, etc.
8. Attraction. The thought of dating someone I haven’t been friends with for a while scares the pants off of me. (Wait, that is a bad metaphor. It scares my pants so that they stay on indefinitely with determination.) If I have the idea that I could possibly date someone eventually, I try to cultivate a friendship with them first. (Ugh. Gross. I just used the phrase “cultivate a friendship,” like it’s something inhuman. Sorry. I’m an ass.)

That last question made me miss a lot of people. Kind of glad this is done. But anyway, I tag YOU. Do this thing. It’s fun and I’ll leave awesome comments on your posts.

Curious Tuesday, volume 7

I’m to that if-I-have-to-write-or-edit-one-more-article-I’m-going-to-flay-someone’s-skin-and-then-make-them-eat-it time of day. It usually comes right after that sick-of-feigning-happiness time of week and just before that knitting-in-the-shower-listening-to-massive-attack-while-possibly-crying time of week. So it’s time to ignore my job for a little bit and indulge in a little curious tuesday-ing.

(If you haven’t noticed, the semi-colon has been de-throned and the hyphen is my new favorite punctuation mark. Who doesn’t love a tidal wave of hyphens?)

Anyway, I was going to write a post about marriage anyway, when this issue of Curious Tuesday popped up.

Image by ✭Lou✭ via Flickr

1. How do you feel about marriage as a concept? Realistic? Romantic? A pipe-dream?

Okay, well this has several answers. First, let’s address marriage as an institution recognized by the government: I completely disagree with the way marriage is treated by the American government today. Frankly it’s none of their business. I do recognize that some recognition of a coupling by the government is necessary to keep society in order. However, I think that the government has no say in who a person should be able to marry (except for minors, of course. Minors should be protected). Our current civil unions are closer to my ideal, but I think that whatever recognition the government hands out should not discriminate, even based on whether or not the relationship is romantic – if I want to combine my life, responsibilities and taxes with any other consenting adult, I should be able to.

As for marriage as a religious institution, I have no opinion of it. Nor interest in it. That is no one’s business but the engaged couple.

Marriage as a specific, individually-created vow, however, I do believe in. For a long time I didn’t understand the purpose of the ceremony, but I’m starting to grasp it more. When I get married, I don’t necessarily want it recognized by the government or any church – but it will still be a marriage. The ceremony will include promises made in front of friends and family. This is an umbrella over all the other questions surrounding what a “marriage” actually is – promises concerning monogamy, practical implications, length, etc. should all be thoughtfully invented by each individual couple.

I know. I’m so romantic. Call Nicholas Sparks, because he’s going to want to write this stuff down.

2. Do you think you’ll ever want to get married?

Yes. I want to for sure. But, obviously, one person abstractly wanting to is far from what’s needed to actually get married.

3. If you did get married, would you want a big blow-out celebration or would you keep it low-key?

I think this question is actually about how much money I want to spend on the ceremony and reception. My answer is: not much at all. But that doesn’t mean it won’t be a big beautiful blow-out celebration.

These last two questions don’t apply to me, but if you readers are married, answer them! Please. We can all learn from your experience.

4. If you are married now, how has that changed your relationship?
5. If you’re married, how did you celebrate it? Knowing what you know now, would you have done it differently?

Curious Tuesday, volume 6

Image by cogdogblog via Flickr

Original post found here.

1. What is your very best beauty tip?
Read good books and pay attention to other people.

2. Who is your arch-nemesis?
Hmm. Everyone is. Or only I am. Or the internet is. Or that girl who lived three houses down from me when I was a kid. Really I’m not important enough to have an arch-nemesis.

3. What are the three things you need to do in order to feel sane?
Knit, of course. Then talk to someone that I care about and then write. In bullet points, most likely. (They’re spreading!)

4. What is the strangest food you have ever eaten?
Hm. I had squid and octopus and stuff like that in Japan, but I don’t think that’s very strange. Just localized. Really, when we get down to what food should be considered “normal,” the strangest food I’ve ever tried would have to be a Hostess cupcake or an energy drink or a Jolly Rancher. Whatever is furthest away from the vegetables in my back yard. Yay, pretentiousness!

5. What is one thing in your wardrobe which makes you feel invincible?
Apparently a swimsuit, because today at the pool I felt fabulous. But really, there is no item of clothing that can transcend or allay my moods.

Curious Tuesday, volume 5

I recently got some new toys for Winston, which he has never once played with. But Grady loves them, obviously. She crawled around with this little yarn mouse in dangling from her mouth for like ten minutes. Anyway, now for your favorite part of the week, I’m sure: Curious Tuesday! Woo. This one is kind of lackluster.

1. Where do you find inspiration?
Well, I’m not sure I ever have found inspiration, if we’re going to get technical. But I guess the internet is where I find what’s closest to it. Or books. Or people. I’m failing at this question.
2. Have you got any hobbies or interests you’ve let lapse & wish you would take up again?
Nope. I’ve been able to maintain most of my hobbies. Ask me again in a year, though, and I’m sure my answer will be very different.
3. One tea party. Ten invitations. Who do you invite?
Eleven people? At a party drinking tea? First of all I would dis-invite myself, and then maybe hide under the table and just listen. I’d like to invite ten people who worked at the same company or had the same interests; that’s when a conversation is most engaging.
4. Who was your favorite teacher at school & why?
I never really thought to connect with my teachers, unfortunately. But I think Mrs. Hadley who taught 9th grade English was my favorite.
5. Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship?
Nope. I’ve ended a relationship because I didn’t want it to be long-distance.

Also, look who can climb up stairs all by herself. Yeah. Horrifying.

Curious Tuesday, Volume 3

Image by joeywan via Flickr

Here is the original post – go look at it. There are pretty pictures. (This was written on June 13. Once again I don’t want to flood the blog with the same kind of posts, so I’m scheduling it. Maybe all of my answers will be totally different by June 22. If they are, I will edit the post.)

1. Who is your #1 crush?

I have no idea! Maybe it’s YOU.

2. Have you ever tried online dating? How did it go? Any tips?

When I was sad and pregnant I set up an account on okcupid that I knew I would get a lot of compliments from – selfish, I know. I just wanted to feel the way I usually do after first meeting people – the first impressions I give are usually more interesting than what comes after. Anyway, about a week later I made all messages from okcupid skip my inbox and go straight to my gmail archives. A couple weeks ago I remembered my account existed, and now I’m kind of horrified to go look at it.
As for tips, I think I just tried to be disarmingly genuine, and only talked about the parts of my life that make me different from the crowd. There’s such a predominant “crowd” in my area that being different (without any affectation) brings you a lot of attention. I’ve been deeply aware of this since I was a young kid, and it kind of bothers me now. Using something genuine as a way to get what I want is like this gross habit I have now, and the hypocrisy of it is disgusting. Now you know about it and you can slap my wrist if you catch me accidentally doing it.
The more I think about it, the more I feel that I will eventually resort to online dating to find someone that I actually want to meet. The statistics of online dating are impressive. Not that I have the will to google them right now.

3. Are you sentimental? Do you keep the things other people give you?

Indeed I do. Thinking of the most sentimental objects I have, I think I accidentally stole most of them from people I love. Whoops.

4. As a child, what were your primary interests?

Being the best at everything all the time. Crushing up plants and pretending to be an apothecary. Trying to get deer to live in my front yard. Walking in straight lines. Wearing more than one skirt at once. Staring out the car window assessing the properties we drove by; trying to guess what happens in their secret spots. Little fuzzy animals in cages. Doing anything I could to make money.

5. What are your top 3 guilty pleasures?

I’m trying to think of actual guilty pleasures – the kind I would be too embarrassed to admit to anyone. Because that is really the only way to give this question an interesting answer. Well, I can at least make an attempt: I like to stand barefoot on hot asphalt until it feels like my feet are on fire. I like to walk around aimlessly at night, indulging in despondency. I like to be part of pretty pictures and I make that a priority. I like to lie on my bed and think about the things I know I shouldn’t think about; the things that will just make everything worse. Don’t tell anyone.

Curious Tuesday, Volume 2

Image via Wikipedia

I’m actually writing this on Sunday, but who wants two meme posts right in a row? I’ll schedule it for Tuesday. And this time, post your answers in the comments here, or the comments over at Gala’s blog, or on your own blog! I’d love to hear your answers.

Go here to discover the origin of Curious Tuesday.

1. Who is your favourite musician, NOT in terms of talent or aptitude, but based on pure sex appeal?

Do I even need to answer this? David Bowie. Everyone should know that the answer to this question will always be David Bowie.

2. What were some quirks of your past lovers that drove you crazy?

I’m going to use a single answer as a blanket: communication issues. I get the feeling that this will be one of my top 5 interpersonal annoyances for the rest of my life.

3. If there was a movie made about your life, what song would you absolutely INSIST be on the soundtrack?

Soul Love, by David Bowie. Of course. Press play!

4. What is your favourite quote right now?

Well, I’m listening to that song so at this precise moment it’s “All I have is my love of love, and love is not loving.” Aw. Also:

“Olympian gods, mark now my bedside lamp
Blown out; and be advised too late that he
Whom you call sire is stolen into the camp
Of warring Earth, and lies abed with me.
Call out your golden hordes, the harm is done:
Enraptured in his great embrace I lie;
Shake heaven with spears, but I shall bear a son
Branded with godhead, heel and brown and thigh.
Whom think not to bedazzle or confound
With meteoric splendours or display
Of blackened moons or suns in the big sound
Of sudden thunder on a silent day;
Pain and compassion shall he know, being mine,-
Confusion never, that is half divine.”
-Edna St. Vincent Millay (one of the four or five poets that don’t make me feel gross)

Also, there are a bunch in Another Country by James Baldwin, which I am currently reading, that I’d like to share, but alas I have lost the book. When (if) I find it I hope I’ll remember to pass on my favorite words and sentences.

5. Connect up with other nonpareils! Post links to your website, Facebook, Twitter, etc., here!

Um, I’m not going to do this because I am lazy and the baby wants to play. And I’d rather play with my baby than copy and paste a bunch of links.

P.S. Grady is whispering at me right now. And it is freaking adorable.

Curious Tuesday

Image via Wikipedia

Remember how much fun those survey memes were? I don’t enjoy filling them out so much anymore – I used to fill out the super long ones as a way to deal with stress. Anyway, the fabulous Gala Darling has this thing called Curious Tuesday. I might just participate this week, or maybe it will continue. For I am as unpredictable as the sea. (I have no idea if the sea is predictable or not, actually.) Anyway:

1. Would you ever get cosmetic surgery? If not, why not? If yes, what would you want done?

If I had a zillion dollars I would, but it’s not really that high on my list of priorities. The first thing I would get is laser hair removal. Without a doubt. Other than that … I don’t know. Is there something that can make all of your skin just pretty? I’d do that.

2. What is “your drink”?

I don’t really have one, which is a cause of much chagrin. I like how in books or movies a character is often summed up by what they drink, and I like to be like characters in books and movies. Then again, I am very young. Probably too young to have a drink of my own yet.

3. What are your five fashion essentials?

Ugh. I have no idea. I can tell you what I needed specifically today, but there’s no continuity. This survey is making me feel like I have no identity whatsoever. Okay: something to make my hair not look ridiculous (hat, pins, headband), a shirt or dress that allows easy access to my boobs (for Grady, of course), shoes that won’t make me trip (because if I trip Grady will get hurt and the entire world will end), glasses (or I won’t be able to see), and … I don’t know. Something that works with the weather.

4. Do you have any tattoos? What are they? If not, do you want some? What would you like to get?

I have three, and I love them all. A reminder on my wrist, something pretty behind my ear, and a tribute to Grady between my shoulderblades. I do want another – just another something pretty, I think.

5. What is something most people don’t know about you?

Absolutely nobody in the world knows that I am wearing bright red trashy terrycloth shorts that say “New York” across the butt right now, as nobody is in this room with me. I need to do laundry because I’m just about out of pajamas. Most people don’t know how much yarn I actually own. Very few people know how much trouble I have with nighttime.